August 2, 2017

My Marshmellow. I didn’t expect to lose you so soon. You took a piece of my heart with you today. Driving you to the vet this morning knowing I would be coming home without you was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I wasn’t ready for you to leave me, but I couldn’t sit by and watch you suffer any longer.

Thank you, Marshmellow for being my soulmate in a furry body. Thank you for sitting with me while I drank my tea and read my books each evening…thank you for always being there to soak up my tears the many times I’ve cried into your fur on rough days…for your soft trills and gentle meows to get my attention…and for your feisty little spirit as you snuck onto the counters another time (I could tell it was you by the white fuzzy pawprints you left behind).

Everyone who saw you couldn’t believe how gorgeous you were. I can’t believe that I won’t be able to gaze into your endless blue eyes another time. Everywhere I look I see you- where you used to lay, where you used to sit…I stop crying long enough to find more of your long white hairs in an unexpected spot, and the tears start again. I can’t bring myself to pick them up and throw them away. I keep expecting you to walk into the bedroom like you do each night, fluffy tail held high and stepping quietly on your dainty paws.

I wish I could’ve spent so much more time with you, sitting quietly on your favorite couch, watching birds fly outside of the window. But life got in the way. I won’t let that happen again. For now I will have to push through this agonizing ache I feel without you here. But I promise I will see you again. I will take your beautiful face into my hands, and look deep into your eyes again. Thank you for the love you’ve given me, Mush. You have helped me through life in more ways than you can possibly know. I will carry you in my heart until we meet again. Love, mommy. <3 .